The Positive Power of No.

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The Positive Power of No.

When we say NO to say YES in acknowledgement our own value and worth, it is an affirmation of dignity. The choice to say NO is liberating as you are saying YES to yourself, and that which is aligned with who you are. You are constantly bombarded with requests for your time, money and commitment, more than you can possibly take on. How do you know which opportunities are right for you? In order to use your time efficiently, and stay sane, you need to be able to say YES and NO with minimum anxiety. Why does guilt so often follow that dreaded word NO – Why do doubt and regret follow so close after the word YES Whether it’s a romantic relationship, family, colleague or friend, we all have to say NO from time to time.

Most of us find this hard and we often end up feeling conflicted. Your adult child wants to borrow money again and you say NO because you don’t want to enable him and you want him to learn responsibility. Your young child wants to stay up late and you say NO because you want to protect her from being tired the next day. Your colleague wants you to take on some of their work and you say NO because you are already overloaded. NO is hard, and YES isn’t much easier. How do you say YES to a child without creating an attitude of entitlement? How do you say NO to a child without crushing their spirit? How do you say YES to a friend without losing your own power? How do you say NO to a friend without harming the relationship? How do you say YES to a client without setting up false expectations? How do you say NO to a client without losing their business? NO is the defining word of negativity, but it doesn’t have to be a negative experience. YES is the defining word of permission, but it isn’t permission to be walked over. YES and NO can work together for the highest good. Saying NO can be a liberating experience for everyone involved, especially when your NO is coming from your highest intention which is clearing the way for a deeper YES. Reclaim the power of NO without guilt. It’s a beautiful thing; for you, for the other person and for the relationship. It offers everyone involved the gift of self-responsibility. When you have clear reasons and a clear strategy for saying NO it becomes a very positive and empowering experience. When you say NO you may be really saying YES to something more important. When we say NO to say YES in acknowledgement our own value as a human being worthy of equality and respect.

The same principle holds for many people leaving relationships or jobs. As hard as it may be, the choice to say NO is liberating because you are stamping a giant YES on your own worth as a human being and leaving yourself open to the many things still in store for you. You are saying YES to yourself and to new relationships and jobs that are more closely aligned with who you are. You deserve to be treated well. You deserve abundance. You deserve life affirming beliefs. You deserve respectful relationships. Say NO to anything less.- We need both YES and NO together. YES is the key word of community, NO the key word of individuality. YES is the key word of connection, NO the key word of protection. YES is the key word of peace, NO the key word of justice. The great art is to learn to integrate the two; unite YES and NO. That is the secret to standing up for yourself and what you need without destroying agreements and relationships. If all you do is say a straight thoughtless NO, you could easily get stuck in a cycle of negativity. Say NO out of a deeper YES, to yourself, that your whole being: mind, body and spirit, soar. Choose relationships that affirm your worth and dignity. Measure everything you hear and read by evidence, by intuition and by your deeper YES. Does it resonate with your deepest vision of peace? Does it make your life more whole and healthy? Does it strengthen your relationships? If you are saying YES to these questions, then you know you are living with integrity. When your highest self you can say NO with ease and it won’t threaten your relationships. It will open up paths you have searched for to the deeper YES that lies within. Please paste the contents of your article here

Written by Debra Stevens
www.energencia.co.za

 

Author - Debra Sevens,

Published - 2013-05-20